May 17th, 2002

emu

Rowan says:

HEAD: Quite frankly Mr. Perkins, if he wasn’t
dead I’d have him expelled.

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HEAD: Quite frankly Mr. Perkins, if he wasn’t
dead I’d have him expelled.

<long pause as Headmaster sits down and sips his
tea. Perkins looks up.>

PERKINS:I beg your pardon?

HEAD: Yes! Expelled! If I wasn’t making allowances
for the fact that your son is dead, he’s be out on
his ear.

PERKINS: He’s dead?

HEAD: Yes... he’s lying up in the sick bay now.
Stiff as a board and bright green.
And it’s very typical of his current attitude.

PERKINS: <shocked> But...

<Headmaster stands up and moves behind Perkins>

HEADMASTER:You see, the boy has no sense of
moderation. One moment he’s flying around like
a paper kite and the next moment he’s completely
immovable. And beginning to smell.

PERKINS: Well, how did he die?!?!

HEADMASTER: Is that important?
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